November 2011
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September 2011
1 post
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August 2011
20 posts
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Life’s Instructions
1.Have a firm handshake.
2.Look people in the eye.
3.Sing in the shower.
4.Own a great stereo system.
5.If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.
6.Keep secrets.
7.Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.
8.Always accept an outstretched hand.
9.Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
10.Whistle.
11.Avoid...
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When I was young, my mother always told me happiness was the key to life. When I...
– John Lennon (via salveo)
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July 2011
2 posts
amazing marketing! →
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June 2011
5 posts
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definitions
study (verb)- the act of texting, eating and watching TV with a textbook open nearby.
winter (noun)- a three month break between women and their razors.
physics (noun)- the science where you use extremely long and complicated formulae to explain why a ball rolls.
tomorrow (noun)- the best time to do everything you had planned for today
friend (noun)- one of the many strangers on facebook
...
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i considered atheism, but there weren’t enough holidays
– unknown
May 2011
39 posts
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Dear Martin Luther King Jr.,
I have a dream within a dream within a dream...
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Dear people who complain about our generation,
Remember who raised us.
...
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Dear Taylor Swift,
If it is of any interest to you, Romeo and Juliet both kill...
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Dear Voldemort,
A couple of lies would take care of that.
Sincerely,...
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Dear Men,
The first jockstrap was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet...
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Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I don’t have time...
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Dear reader,
Please do me right now. On the kitchen table. In your bed. On the...
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Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea…...
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Dear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know,...
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Dear Students,
I know when you’re texting.
Sincerely, No one just...
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Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
...
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Dear icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Enjoy the...
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Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no...
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